Feeling a Sense of Belonging and the Ability to Ask for Help as Reduce Risk of Suicide
Suicide prevention is an urgent and complex issue, one that demands not just awareness but a deep understanding of the factors that contribute to suicidal thoughts and behaviors. Among the many theories that seek to explain why people take their own lives, Thomas Joiner’s Interpersonal Theory of Suicide stands out for its focus on the role of interpersonal relationships in mental health, and more specifically, suicide risk.
In this blog post, we’ll explore Joiner’s theory, which emphasizes three core components: perceived burdensomeness, thwarted belongingness, and capability for suicide. We’ll discuss the first two components—belongingness and the importance of seeking help—as crucial protective factors that can help reduce the risk of suicide.
The Core Components of Joiner’s Theory
Thomas Joiner’s Interpersonal Theory of Suicide is grounded in the idea that two specific interpersonal experiences—feeling like a burden to others and feeling disconnected from social groups—are significant predictors of suicidal thoughts and actions.
- Perceived Burdensomeness: This is the feeling that one is a burden to others, that their existence causes pain or hardship for loved ones. People who struggle with this belief often feel that they are more of a liability than an asset to their family, friends, or community.
- Thwarted Belongingness: This refers to the feeling of social isolation or the belief that one does not belong to any meaningful social group. A lack of close, supportive relationships is a major contributor to mental health challenges. When individuals perceive that they have no one to turn to, this feeling of alienation can drive hopelessness and, in extreme cases, suicidal thoughts.
- Capability for Suicide: The final component of Joiner’s theory is the idea that people who have developed a certain threshold for self-injury or suicide through repeated exposure to painful or fear-inducing experiences may come to see death as a viable option. This might stem from previous suicide attempts or a desensitization to pain.
Joiner’s theory suggests that when someone feels both a sense of burdensomeness and belongingness is thwarted, and when they develop the capability for suicide, the risk of suicide becomes tragically heightened.
The Role of Belonging: A Powerful Protective Factor
One of the most powerful insights from Joiner’s theory is the critical importance of belonging. When people feel connected, supported, and valued by others, their sense of purpose and self-worth is reinforced, which can serve as a protective shield against suicidal ideation.
The Need for Social Connection
Humans are inherently social creatures, and the need for connection is not just a psychological desire but a biological imperative. Studies have shown that strong social ties can improve mental health, reduce stress, and increase resilience in the face of challenges. In contrast, loneliness and isolation have been linked to a range of mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts.
Thwarted belongingness—feeling disconnected from others—can make individuals feel like their lives don’t matter. For those experiencing mental health struggles, this disconnection can lead to a downward spiral, where negative emotions like worthlessness or hopelessness grow unchecked.
Thus, creating and nurturing a sense of belonging is essential in suicide prevention. This can mean fostering deeper connections with friends, family, coworkers, or peers. It might also involve supporting someone in joining social groups or communities where they can feel valued and supported. Whether through church groups, volunteer work, or shared hobbies, having places where one is seen, heard, and appreciated can create a crucial buffer against feelings of isolation.
Breaking the Stigma of Isolation
One of the most harmful effects of isolation is the stigma that surrounds mental health struggles. Many people, particularly those who are suffering in silence, may feel too ashamed to reach out for help because they fear rejection or misunderstanding. This belief can deepen the sense of alienation.
However, creating environments—whether in families, workplaces, schools, or communities—where belonging is actively encouraged can break this cycle. When we normalize the idea that everyone can struggle with their mental health, we help to remove the stigma and encourage more people to seek support when they need it most.
Asking for Help: The Vital Step Toward Healing
In addition to fostering belonging, being comfortable asking for help is a key protective factor against suicide. Joiner’s theory emphasizes that individuals at risk of suicide often feel trapped by their circumstances and unable to reach out, either due to perceived burdensomeness or a lack of belief that help is available. However, developing the skills and confidence to ask for help can significantly reduce this risk.
Normalizing Vulnerability
Asking for help can be incredibly difficult, especially in cultures that emphasize self-reliance and independence. Many people fear that asking for support might make them appear weak or incapable. However, vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. By demonstrating the courage to reach out to others—whether it’s a friend, a therapist, or a support group—we allow others to help us shoulder our burdens.
For someone experiencing thoughts of suicide, this simple yet powerful act of asking for help can make all the difference. It is a step toward reclaiming control over one’s life and breaking the isolation that often fuels suicidal thoughts.
Practical Steps to Encourage Help-Seeking
There are many ways to encourage help-seeking behaviors in those who may be struggling. Some of these include:
- Developing a strong support system: Cultivating relationships where open communication is encouraged can help normalize the process of asking for help.
- Promoting mental health education: Educating people about the warning signs of suicide and how to reach out for support can empower individuals to take action before it’s too late.
- Providing access to resources: Ensuring that mental health resources are accessible, whether it’s therapy, helplines, or community support programs, can make it easier for people to take the first step toward seeking help.
- Encouraging check-ins and open conversations: Regularly checking in on friends, family members, or colleagues and providing opportunities for open conversations about mental health can reduce the stigma around asking for help.
The Power of Belonging and Asking for Help
Joiner’s Interpersonal Theory of Suicide underscores the importance of belonging and seeking help as essential protective factors in suicide prevention. By fostering a sense of connection and encouraging openness about mental health struggles, we can help reduce the social isolation that so often leads to despair.
Belonging and the willingness to ask for help are not just abstract ideas—they are tangible, life-saving actions. If we can create supportive environments and encourage those struggling with suicidal thoughts to reach out, we will be taking crucial steps toward preventing suicide and fostering a culture of compassion, resilience, and mutual care.
If you or someone you know is struggling, remember that help is available. Reaching out is a sign of strength, and there is no shame in asking for support. Your life, and the lives of those you care about, can be transformed through connection, understanding, and the courage to seek help.
If you need help or support, Call The Upper Room, 1-888-808-8724, a faith-based hotline for people experiencing distress and in need of a compassionate listener.